Hello again.  It’s been two years since my last post.  I do apologize for the abrupt absence.

         In recent months, life has opened new doors and offered new energy, including a growing readiness to return to writing. That readiness now feels ripe.  My intention is to post again on a regular basis – and to give a “heads up” when gaps are likely to occur.

         I am happy to be back with this practice – and back with you.

Our Story Too

         In the classic Christmas story, God took human form with the birth of Jesus.  In this story, the Incarnation was a one-time, one-person event.  Never happened before with anyone. Never will happen again with anyone else.

         I’ve come to enjoy a different version of the Incarnation story.  In this narrative, Jesus came to the realization – perhaps gradually, perhaps suddenly - that he was one with God.  In its final form, this realization was not an abstract idea for Jesus, but a fully-integrated knowing that permeated his spirit, his mind and every cell in his body.  

         The Incarnation was not an event.  It was a deep, embodied knowing.  Jesus literally realized (made real) and revealed a truth that the Divine is fully present in each human.  Each of us shares a divine nature.  Each of us is one with God.

         So … what if the Christmas story is not just about Jesus?  What if the Incarnation is our story, too?

         Have a merry and meaningful Christmas!

Two Commitments

       I turned 70 yesterday.  For a while, that number felt alarming.  Now, it’s mostly an invitation to re-orient toward fullness of life, to remember what’s important, to re-visit my commitments.  And, while there are many commitments in my life, two have recently come to the foreground:  Care for this being, called James, and transparency to the Flow of Love.

       I grew up with the notion that self-neglect is a virtue, that self-disparagement is humility, and that self-sacrifice is the highest Christian path.  I honor my tradition’s teaching to care for others and move away from self-absorption.  And I continue to work at releasing old, internalized invitations to disrespect, distrust and devalue my personhood.  

       When I care for myself in a grown-up way, there is no disregard for others.  There is, however, a claiming of responsibility for the life entrusted to me.  I don’t ask others to assume that responsibility – it’s mine. 

       Each day, I affirm self-forgiveness, self-acceptance, trust in, and love for, this being – with no claim of greater or lesser worth than anyone else.  I care for my physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual health.  I nourish myself in each of those areas – as best I can – treating myself to good things and opening to the beauty around me.

       I listen to myself, attending mindfully to the various voices in my inner conversation – fear, shame, anger, yearning, desire, hope, love, thoughts, stories, values, commitments and consecrations.  I honor the little kid inside, the grown-up realist, the wise and loving inner guide.  In giving every part of me a voice, I do my best not to let the youngest and loudest voices dominate the conversation or control the decisions.  I pay special attention to the older, quieter voices deeper down.  As I listen in the quiet, agitation settles and muddy waters clarify.  Wisdom speaks.  Integrity unfolds.  And I am graced.

       The second commitment, transparency to Love, involves a softening and an opening to the Flow of the Universe.  I lighten and let go.  I release any resistance to the Flow of Love – any resistance to receiving and radiating, freely and abundantly.  I regularly re-mind myself and renew my commitment to transparency.  I remember that, in this Flow, separation dissolves.   Warfare within ceases.  I am peacefully present.  Right action naturally emerges. 

       Breathing helps us open to Flow.  Here are some practices I’ve been using.

       Connecting Heaven and Earth.  Inhale up from Earth through the soles of the feet into the heart; then exhale from the heart up through the top of the head into the heavens.  Or, reversing the process, inhale down from the heavens through the top of the head into the heart; then exhale from the heart down through the soles into Earth.  (If seated, you can substitute the base of the torso for the soles of the feet.)

       Whole Body Breathing.  Inhale light/love through every pore, into every cell of the body.  Exhale, sending light/love from every cell out through every pore.

       Shambhala Warrior Breathing.  Inhale deeply.  Gently extend the exhalation.  Follow and join the molecules of exhaled air as they dissolve into space.  Let yourself also dissolve – into the spaciousness of the Universe, into Oneness.

       Breathing Love.  Inhale Universal Love into the heart and exhale Love back to the Universe.  Love in.  Love out. Let your heart unite with the One Heart that embraces all.

       Transparency opens us to partnership with the Universe.  Love flow through us during meditation and quiet times.  It flows through us at work, at play and in all our interactions.  It flows when we’re awake and when we’re asleep.  With transparency, each of us becomes a Love radiator, a healing presence wherever we go.

       So, two commitments: to self and to Self.  The self that I care for on this planet dances with, and dissolves into, a larger Self, a Flow of Love.  Identity expands, softens, and, at times, appears to disappear. 

       I can think of no better way to contribute to the well being of All – including the well being of 70-year-old James.

Emptiness and Allness

Emptiness gives birth to Love.

Love gives birth to Everything.

Everything returns to Emptiness

And is born anew.

Emptiness is home to Allness.

Allness is home to Emptiness.

Love is the pathway

Home.

Emptiness and Allness -

Infinite, intimate, creative

Twirling and whirling -

God, Dancing Love.

Force or Flow

       I haven’t written in weeks.  The lapse nags at me – along with other important things that aren’t getting done.  With my 70^th birthday a few months down the road, I’m busier and working more than ever before. 

       I’ve been experimenting with flow, practicing non-resistance to the flow of a work-heavy life.  I’ve been amazed at how much can get done, with little sense of effort – working softer and freer, not harder.

       Over-extension interrupted the rhythm.  Self-nagging brought flow to a crawl.  Forcing, as it inevitably does, generated resistance.  Work was hard again.

       Deciding to just do it, I sit at the keyboard – consciously releasing the inner nag, softening, opening, inviting the free and joyful flow this practice brings.  Just begin, James.  Let being slip into doing.  Allow an unfolding that forgoes figuring, planning, time press and insistence upon efficiency, profundity and perfection.

       I think about the flow of life, the syncopated rhythm of flow and force – periods of inner companionship and cooperation, punctuated by the interior stalemate of pushing and resisting.  Sometimes, doing the dance, we are one with the music.  Sometimes, it seems, we’re out there with two left feet. 

       I feel a smile of mercy for all us beings, whose residence in flow is so inconsistent. 

       For six years now, I’ve been writing and sending forth.  The original intent was not to submit my work, but to quote others whose wise voices fueled my soul – thus, the heading “Weekly Wisdoms”.  I doubt if, back then, I’d dare call my writing “wisdom”.   After the first week or two, my voice elbowed its way to the foreground, and, for quite some time, writing flowed on a near-weekly basis.  Not so now.

       I need to bow to the reality of life as it is and release myself from the self-imposed pressure of weekly postings.  It’s time to honor my natural irregularity – as I honor my commitment to this practice and my enjoyment of sitting at this keyboard with you.  I won’t let this go.  I intend to let it find its rhythm.

       And so, a new heading:  Wisdom Writings.

       Thank you.

Softening to Well-Disguised Gifts

       I’ve been touched lately by the challenges life brings to people I care about.  I see the heroism of my 95-year old mother, facing her mortality, talking freely about it, bouncing back yet one more time from debilitating health issues.  I see the heroic spirit of dear friend who, in the face of inoperable cancer, throws a celebration-of-life party and continues to engage life, outliving predictions.  In my office, I see heroes every day, facing all sorts of adversity.  I see the courage required from them to keep putting one foot in front of the other, taking that next step with integrity, even when the path looks bleak and uncertain.  I see the courage of showing up and the courage of letting go.

       Here’s a passage from Mark Nepo in The Endless Practice, which speaks of eloquently about what life calls forth in us.

     “Tragedy happens to ordinary people every day: a loved one dies, or leaves, a purpose is lost, a life’s work is destroyed, our investment in a dream seems wasted when the dream catches fire.  Herein lies the mystery of woundedness and its infinite connection to aliveness:  life constantly asks us to meet fear and pain with love.  Not an easy thing to do.  But when we can, it’s like dousing a fire with water.  In the simmer, we are softened to each other and refined by the air.  This is the hard gift that waits in the troubles of living….

       “It is often at the intersection of beauty and suffering that we find meaning.  When vulnerable, the sage in us appears.  When softened, we often find wisdom in the press of beauty against pain.”  (Nepo, pp. 130-131)

       I am challenged by Mark’s words and by the heroism I see around me - to open my heart fully and resolutely to life and its curriculum - to stay transparent to the flow of love, in all circumstances – and to soften, with wisdom and courage, when faced with life’s well-disguised gifts. 

Wilderness Wisdom

       I’m just back from a wonderful, five-day wilderness retreat in the Boundary Waters with my good friend, Rich.  We spent much of the time in silence, soaking in the beauty around us – sights and sounds – waters rushing, waves lapping on the shore, the lush greens of cedars and pines, dramatic sunsets and moon sets, including one spectacular descending sun haloed in double-rainbow light.  For me it was a much-needed time to rest and recover from depletion, to listen in stillness, to re-connect with life, to re-balance and re-focus.

       We camped on a peninsula with a path – maybe a couple hundred yards long - connecting the lakeside where we pitched our tents and the riverside where the roar of the rapids immediately hushed my inner chatter.

       On the second day, that short hike between lake and river slowed to a walking meditation.  With each inhalation, I invited earth’s loving energy into my soles and up through my body to the top of my head.  With each exhalation, I sent the energy back down through my body and back into the earth.  My intention was to be as open and transparent as possible to the healing flow of love.

       At some point it struck me:  I was making love with Mother Earth – and being made love to.  I felt a pure connection with the Divine Feminine – and an ancient, familiar hunger for deep communion with the Feminine.    

       As I stayed with the experience, I remembered, once again, the spiritual nature of this hunger, the wisdom of approaching this hunger as a yearning for the Divine Within, and the goofiness that accompanies my efforts to satisfy this spiritual hunger in the realm of flesh and blood relationship. 

Nourishing Psyche and Soul

       As I review the teachings of Richard Moss, I’m struck by how deeply he attends to the fullness of our humanity - how he invites growth in realms physical, psychological and spiritual.

       We humans - embodied, self-reflective and spiritual beings -live with a complexity, not experienced elsewhere in creation, as far as we know.  Angels and animals, I imagine, operate much more simply.  For us, the body, the psyche and the soul need nurture in a balanced way.  Neglect or over-emphasis of any one aspect harms the whole. 

       Here are a couple of nourishing exercises I’ve been enjoying lately.  Both involve the breath.  One is for psyche.  One is for soul.

       Embracing Vulnerability.  I’m vulnerable.  When cut, I bleed.  When rejected, I hurt.  When a friend dies, I grieve.  I’m vulnerable to fear and anxiety, to anger and resentment, to shame and regret.  I’m vulnerable to the thoughts and stories I create.  I’m vulnerable to the prospect of death.  I’m vulnerable to the temporary nature of joy.

       Instead of battling vulnerability and working so hard to perfect my inner life, I can soften in mindful and compassionate awareness.  Rather than controlling me, I can companion me. 

       So, in this first exercise, I begin by noticing and acknowledging whatever I’m experiencing.  I sense it in my body. Then, gently, I breathe into the bodily sensation and let its energy move through me as I exhale.

       I become less resistant and more transparent to my humanity.  I flow.

       Breathing Love.  Love is the first expression of God and the essence of our spiritual nature.  Love is the energy that feeds the spirit, connects us in oneness and, at a fundamental level, defines us. 

       In this exercise, as I inhale, I bring universal love (sometimes imaged as light) into my heart.  With each exhalation, I release the love, imagining it radiating outward/everywhere.

       By consciously breathing love, we enter the flow of an expanding universe of love.  We soften.  Our hearts naturally melt into the One Heart. 

       We become more transparent to our divinity.

       Two nourishing exercises – both inviting us to soften and simplify – both gently guiding us toward ever deepening wholeness and ever deeper transparency with life itself.

       Enjoy!

Richard

       My time with Richard Moss – teacher, mentor, author and fellow sojourner – has been truly transformative.  This fall, he is coming to central Minnesota to offer a Deep Work retreat.

       Richard listens deeply to soul and psyche.  Mystical and practical, Richard’s teaching and his presence invite movement in stillness, a greater comfort in one’s own skin and a richer relationship with self, other and the larger field of life that connects all.  With insight, wisdom, tenderness and humor, Richard companions us along the courageous path of inner spaciousness, where the heart expands and the mind makes room for mystery – and we remember that we already are that which we seek.

       Please join me, as part of a small group of fellow travelers, in what promises to be an extraordinary gathering, with an extraordinary guide.

       To find out more, please click on the following link:

  http://richardmoss.com/events/deep-work-in-minnesota-readying-the-soul-for-its-next-steps/

       Note:  Scholarships are available for those with limited finances and a heart for deep work.

God Consciousness

       This mystery story, in its latest form, came to me during a series of meditations around the Easter season.  I share it with hesitation and humility.  On the one hand, it feels a bit blasphemous.  On the other hand, it’s not a new story.  It’s been told off and on – and is remarkably similar to the message someone got crucified for sharing nearly 2000 years ago. 

       In the beginning, there was no thing.  Only sacred emptiness, a profound, fertile, eternal, intelligent, creative silence – God.

       Suddenly, the Silence expressed itself in an amazing blossoming of love – hot love, intense love, sublime love, messy love – unbelievably creative and destructive.  Were there anyone to observe it, the blossoming would have seemed totally chaotic.  We now know it to be an expression with an underlying order and intelligence.

       In this story, the first expression of God is love. The next expression, as blossoming cooled, is light.  With ever more cooling comes density.  The material world forms.  It, too, is spoken.  Every star, planet, mountain, sea, rock, tree, insect, turtle, fish, bird, mammal, and human is a word in the vocabulary of God. 

       Everything – love, light, matter – is an expression of God.  Every interaction is an interaction with God.  When we hold a rock, behold a sunset, touch a leaf, break bread, sip wine, caress a lover or laugh with a child, we are communing with God. 

       Human consciousness allows us to re-trace the movements of divine expression, to move closer to Source.  We all are familiar with the density of the material world, including the density of the human personality, which can be quite goofy.  We all know about living there. 

       Many of us are learning how to spiritually soften, to raise our vibrations.  We remember that we are also light.  As we continue to lighten – enlighten, perhaps – we remember that we are love.

       And, sometimes, sojourning into silence, we enter the deepest mystery of God consciousness, the wordless apprehension that, along with everything else we are – goofiness, density, light, love – we are God.  All is God.

      Imagine the impact on this planet if we brought God consciousness to all our relationships – with each other, with plants and animals, and with earth herself. 

       Imagine the peace.  Imagine the reverence.  Imagine the joy.

Breathing Toward Quiet

       Some days, there’s so much chatter inside that invitations toward the quiet Divine Within are difficult to honor.  I don’t like to yank myself into quiet.  I don’t want to make meditation a battle.  For times when the journey feels like a big leap, I wonder about a series of smaller steps that can assist in the movement toward quiet inner spaciousness. 

       This morning, I experimented with a structured approach that feels gentle and respectful – and was quite helpful.  It begins by breathing into, and out from, the seven energy centers called chakras:  the root (base of the body’s trunk), the sacral (lower belly), the solar plexus (upper belly), the heart, the throat, the third eye (middle of the forehead) and the crown (top of the head).

       The first step is one of clearing/cleansing.  Inhale love/light into the root chakra.  (I invite love energy to move up from Mother Earth or in from the Universe.)  Exhale with the intention of clearing the chakra, sending whatever energy is not needed back to the universe or down to the earth for composting.  (I find it helpful to say “love” on the inhalation and “clear” on the exhalation.)  Repeat with the other chakras – in ascending order – devoting a breath (or two or three) to each energy center.

       The second step is just like the first one, except that it focuses on opening.  Inhale love/light into each chakra and invite/imagine chakras opening as you exhale.  I find helpful the words “love” (as I breathe in) and “open” (as I breathe out).  Some folks imagine flowers opening.

       The third step deepens heart opening.  Inhale love/light into the heart.  Exhale love/light from the heart, radiating love outward.  For words, I use “love” when inhaling and “forth” when exhaling.   

       The final step (described with more detail in my last posting) is the movement toward the spacious, quiet Divine Within.  Inhale love/light into the heart; exhale gently toward the deep quiet at the center of being.  Here again, at first, it may help to use words like “love” and “quiet”, as you breathe in and out.  As the quiet deepens, all words fade.

       Structure is meant to help, not to confine.  No need for precision or perfection here.  Life is flexible and forgiving.  Communion with the Divine Within is natural for us.  Paths to quiet spaciousness are many and unique.  Just pay attention to what feels good/right.  

       And trust your heart.