Entering relationship means entering the realm of mystery.We are mysterious, paradoxical beings - mysterious to ourselves, at times, and mysterious, for sure, to each other.Part of the paradox is that, at the core of our nature, we are unique (but not separate) and one (but not the same).
From my vantage point on intimate relationship, it's possible that all of the following statements are true:We are one.We are two.We are three.
Reflecting this notion is a short poem I wrote a dozen years ago.
Trinitarian Addition
Two-ness
In Oneness
And Oneness
In Two-ness
Make Three-ness
In Oneness
In Tunas
And Everything Else.
After putting out the recent wisdom, Three Pronouns of Relationship, I received feedback from a couple of you (thank you Cyndi and Betsy) emphasizing the cosmic nature of relationship.As I opened more deeply during a recent meditation to that level of reality, the thought came:how about six pronouns? – i, you, we, I, YOU, WE.
The lower case pronouns refer to that psychological level of reality, where we encounter uniqueness and human goofiness.Gary Zukav calls this the "level of personality".The capital letters refer to the cosmic or spiritual level of reality, where all is one and all is love – the "level of soul".We relate to each other at both levels.One of them, however, is more complicated than the other.
As I think about the Softening to Love retreat I'm offering later this spring, I'm excited to explore balance and integration in these levels of relationship – the psychological and the spiritual. I also look forward to building balance into the three main activities of the retreat - conversation, guided experience and quiet reflection.
Please check out the updated description of the retreat at my website:www.softeningtolove.comAs always, your feedback is much appreciated.
Who knows, as pronouns proliferate, maybe next week there'll be nine.
"James has a very welcoming presence and an easy going demeanor in addition to an excellent sense of humor . We are all free to be our own goofy selves."
James Bryer - Softening to Love
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