Two Tasks of Relationship

        Two tasks of relationship are showing up and letting go.  Both actions are loving and respectful things to do.  Neither is easy.

        Showing up is an act of engagement.  You show up when you move toward someone in a way that authentically reveals who you are.  You speak from your heart and mind with the intention of revealing yourself, not to manipulate or make something happen.  A second way to show up is to listen without judgment, to respectfully enter the world of the other person in a way that appreciates its uniqueness, and to respond in way that conveys your acceptance and understanding.

        While showing up involves doing, letting go means not doing; it is an act of disengagement.  Sometimes, this is misused as a tactic to signal the other that you’re not happy and you want him/her to shape up.  The letting go that fosters relationship comes from an acknowledgment of differences, a willingness to live with what is, versus pushing for what ought to be.  You can agree to disagree, without erecting barriers and closing your hearts to each other.

        Two simple concepts:  Showing up and letting go – a rhythm, a mix, a balance.  Simple, but not easy.